NICK BRUECHLE BOOKS
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    • Entanglement

Entanglement

I hate wave functions. You know the ones, where everyone is expected to go – or at least to pop in – but no one wants to.

​I made an appearance at one recently; so boring. Everyone just floating around as a probability, no one willing to stand still for a one-on-one interaction. If you’re looking for commitment, a wave function is the last place you should be, trust me.

So I was at this thing, uncertain as to whether to stay or to go, or do both. There’s a high probability I was drinking vodka, and a somewhat lower one that I was on water – ha ha I bet you know how that one worked out. Anyway, I was just waving to a friend when I felt, all of a sudden, like I was being watched. It was such a shock, so instantaneous, that (I admit it), I collapsed right then and there.

I had been wantonly, lusciously, enthrallingly Eigenstated.

Talk about feeling insignificant! I was a mere particle in his gaze. And he? Oh, he was the finest quantum I had ever encountered. I said to myself, well you look like a single photon, but I’m sure you could create a hell of an interference pattern in me. I can’t wait to try the double slit experiment on you.

For a full nanosecond, we simply observed each other. Of course, he had an up spin, the cheeky bugger. Entranced as I was by that spin, I couldn’t quite pin down his position, or his momentum, but he was fast. Real fast. In 5.349 x 10-44 of a second he put it out there. “So. Shall we get...entangled?”

I wavered.

​“Come on, there are only two possibilities: yes or no.”

He was right. I mean, Carpe Planck Time, you know?

I agreed, and just like that we were hopelessly, gloriously and eternally entangled. It was beautiful.
And then he was gone. Boom! Disappeared, just like that. He’s out there, somewhere; in all probability attending some wave function or other, shimmering in and out of existence like it’s no big deal.

But that’s fine, because I know that wherever I am in this big, crazy universe, if I’m up, he’s down; if I’m clock, he’s counter. In fact, whatever state I’m in, he’s my perfect complement. And he gets there faster than the speed of light.

​Ain’t entanglement grand?
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  • Home
  • About
  • Contact
  • Books
    • The World Without Mirrors
    • The Psyman
    • The Cat Man
    • The Reprint
    • The Surfer Alone
    • The Burnt Islands
  • Stories
    • The Secrets of Immortality
    • Sweet Dreams
    • Paranoia
    • The Foamer
    • Ice Cream
    • Anatomy 101
    • When the horizon goes black
    • Rage
    • Core
    • Death of a Writer
    • Invisibility
    • The Ride
    • The Barrel
    • Franklin
    • Paralysis
    • The Candidate
    • Priorities
    • An Awkward Conversation
    • This pale, decrepit vestige.
    • Road Tripping
    • Entanglement